Thursday, April 9, 2009

Use Power to Educate


In William Ury's book Getting Past No, he explains a fifth barrier to joint-problem solving: the other side's power. If the other side can get what they want by acting on power plays there will be no reason for them to cooperate with you. They may view the negotiation as one side winning and the other side losing and will do their best to drive you into submission. Don't allow your goal to shift from mutual satisfaction to victory. Ury advises, "Use power to bring them to their senses, not to their knees." Furthermore, "Use your power to educate the other side that the only way for them to win is for both of you to win together."
If this does not yield a joint resolution, the next step is to let them know the consequences of not not reaching a mutual agreement by asking the following Reality-Testing Questions:
1. What do you think will happen if we don't agree?
2. What do you think I will do?
3. What will you do?
If this does not bring you closer to an agreement, Ury advises making a direct statement of what will happen. This will provide the other side an opportunity to "reconsider their refusal to negotiate." However, you must be careful to warn and not threat. According to Ury, "A threat is an announcement of your intention to inflict pain, injury, or punishment on the other side...A warning, in contrast, is an advance notice of danger." A warning must be delivered with respect, and the more urgent the warning, the greater respect needed in the delivery.

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